Mie ... My Own Enemy

When some people said the worst enemy is yourself ... I think they are right. These few days I have been battling with my insecurities, laziness, procrastination and sudden low self-esteem. Just because, I was so not up to driving in Brisbane. 

I don't like driving to be honest and I don't like driving big cars. I would say my driving skills are among the WORLD best (hahahaha considering I had been driving in Malaysia's worst traffic cities) but I just don't like driving and it always made me stressful having to drive to work or running errands etc. The funny thing was, the other day when my friend drove me from my Sir Fred Schonell Drive to Kenmore, I felt like taking over the wheel.

Looking back, those years when I used to take bus or taxi to work in Damansara, I couldn't wait to own a car. How cool I would look driving in my sunnies hehehe. But finally when I owned one, reality began to sink in. It took me 6 months (hmm maybe less) to gain the confidence to drive away from the usual route to work. However, to my surprise, I met a friend who had stayed in Kuala Lumpur much earlier than me, love driving, but never venture out from Puchong. By the time we reunited, I already had Froggy for 3 years and Klang Valley was just at the end of my fingertips (and that includes Shah Alam, Bukit Beruntung, Kuala Kubu Baru, Sungai Buluh as well as Putrajaya and its surroundings). Thanks to family members who often request for favours and thought KL is like Simanggang hahaha

Last night I couldn't sleep. Worrying if I couldn't handle the rented car and the GPS. Wondering where to go with the car after the pick-up (yes ... I  decided to pick up a day earlier). Honestly I was baffled myself, this was not my first time driving in Brisbane!!! Guess what, I prayed to God ... seeking His divine intervention in this stupidity. And yes ... it worked. At least this morning I find myself got up, took my bath and head for the city ... stress free but blank!

Another surprise awaited when I arrived at Thrifty counter at Brisbane International Airport terminal. Instead of giving me the Toyota Corolla hatchback compact car that I booked, they decided to give me a bigger, and sportier car ...Mitsubishi Lancer .... hohoho. I just don't like sedan car! Somehow I didn't complain and accepted it.

Having said that ... that little White Baby and me click off immediately. I took a few minutes to get myself familiarised with the "mechanics" , shortly after I found myself cruising to Sunnybank despite forgetting to adjust the rear and side mirror (and put the auto gear on 2 instead of D which made loud sound when I hit the pedal). Felt like taiko pulak ...

Sunnybank gave me another challenge ... parking space during lunch time! Oh damn. Never knew this place is a HIT during lunch. Put on my KL driver cap and voilaaaaa ... parking was a breeze and sangatttttt kemas berbanding orang sebelah! Minor adjustment later, me and White Baby felt like me and Froggie! Yes, my baby is in good care of my sis.

Few hours later, I arrived in Kenmore with White Baby, with renewed confidence and plans to visit Ipswich and Toowomba tomorrow! Excited, excited! Okay guys ... meet White Baby 832. Sure kena loteri esok!

Macam la kereta sendiri kannnn .... kalau kat Malaysia tak mampu mak nak bawak Lancer uolsss

A Year In Brisbane

I had been wanting to update this blog since beginning of the Winter Semester Break. However, small little things caused me to procrastinate. One of it is ... I don't know what to write. The usual excuse, I know. As I read through my previous posts, how it was apparent to me how less and less creative I had been.

Having said that, I thank two courses last semester that inspired me to write again. I realised writing, particularly "reflective writing" is one of my strengths. In fact, it helped me through my courses this semester. It helped me to organise my throughts, provided me the "mission" and "aim" for my research and most important of all, ignite some passion on topics I find boring. I don't remember which famous classic actress that said this but it has something to do with "you need to fall in love a bit with your co-star in order to nail the love scene"... does it make sense?

I contributed "expectation not met" as one of the main reasons I seemed quite lost this one year. Despite many wonderful (as well as terrible) things happened throughout this one year .... it failed to give me the profound impact that urge me to write about it. I love sharing it on Facebook anyway. Yeaaa ... I find micro-blogging via Facebook stimulating. Maybe because I got feedback almost immediately.

Another reason, I have to admit, is I began to question the definition of friend. Do you really know your friend? I experienced a very sad situation recently that made me questions this. Is your friend a friend if he/she befriend you to dig your dirt and used it against you? I am not proud what I did in retaliation ... digging his/her dirt and used it against him/her. On top of that, prior to moving to Brisbane, my professional career expanded to a point that I began to witness "unwanted interest" on my personal life. 

The funny thing is ... my life is an open book, I shared almost everything on social media but looking at how a person mind can be distorted by self interest be it political, ego, religions etc etc ... I began to wonder about my honest intention to share about my life. I began to fear writing and sharing too much especially nowadays your good intention may be "misinterpreted" or turn into "accusation/lies". Looking at Malaysia and Malaysians today ... "whatever you say will be used against you". It is very sad as life used to inspire me with its many mysteries, the unknown and the possibilities. 

Coming back to this blog somehow reminded me on why I started it many years ago, and why many people visited it. I told myself, it was meant to share positive matters, issues, opinions plus happiness ... not ignite hatred, spreading malicious lies, or condemnation. I am a Malaysian, with a mind of my own and entitle to my opinion. You may agree or disagree with me.

I thank friends and readers of this blog for your support. I will restart again ... this time with renewed spirit and energy.